I live along the wild turkey trail here in this village near the sea. The turkeys roost in the trees at one end of town, and flock for food to the opposite side of town, near the woods. No matter how I try to redirect their trail by blocking the gate or flashing lights or shaking my fists… the damn turkeys trot right across my front lawn twice a day, leaving little piles of turkey shit along the path.
Today, I had a couple of quick errands to run… to the post office and the corner store. I wore my new sneakers… the ones with the deep (slip proof) treds. It’s been raining and I did not want to slip in any mud. I tried to stay on the road and avoid the puddles, but somehow my sneakers picked up the damn turkey poop that’s everywhere along the road!
It’s my own fault, I should have taken the sneakers off on the back porch and walked inside with only socks on my feet. But I didn’t and now there is turkey shit all across my kitchen floor! It’s even on the rug at the front door. Big smears of shit spots!!!!
Deep breath…. I’ve swept and washed the floor and sprayed carpet cleaner on the rug… need to let that dry before I vacuum it up! But! GAWD!!! I really HATE wild turkeys!!! Isn’t it enough the CoronaVirus has us all quarantined in our homes… go outside and you get bombed by Turkey Shit…..
I’m beginning to feel depressed. Somebody send me happy vibes, please!
There are a lot of choice words in this one! Don’t ever comment on my use of expletives again.? step carefully in the future and scoop the poop before I visit once again. ?????????????????
When I read the title, I thought you were referring to the Turkey in the big white house…the one who smears shit everywhere then blames everyone else.